Friday Sharing w/You

Friday, May 27

2016 FSY Week 022 - Be HappyHooray, it’s Friday !

Today’s is Perfectly Imperfect & get FIRED up!

 

Hello Friends & PengYiu,

As always, please join me in advocating:

Make Money & Love Safety

赚钱第一; 安全在我心! & 明天一定会更好!加油哦

Jana Wang, Cinta Keselamatan

 

Quick Quotable

 

Goal setting as simple as KFC

Know what you want

Focus on what you want

Change your habit until you get what you want – author unknown, can be FSYQualipreneur

 

Quick Question

What is the invention where people actually can hear a person talk thousand miles away?

 

Today Sharing:

My

Mother-In-Law

 

I have a confession to make. I love my mother-in-law. There, I’ve said it.

 

Mothers-in-law (MIL) have a special status in our society, though sadly most people are familiar with the stereotype of  “MAD”  mother-in-law (M) Meddling, (A) Annoying & (D) Domineering.

 

My mother-in-law does not conform to this “MAD” in any way. Right from the beginning we become Best Friends Forever so much so that when my wife annoyed me, I used to threaten her that I would go home to her mother.

 

When my children are young she stays with us. She does not rearrange our furniture, criticises our lifestyle choices or nags our children.  She is happy when we are happy, and offers solace when we are not. She lives her own life to the fullest and always has.

 

When my mother-in-law hit 81 years old in 2012, she wanted to celebrate her birthday. I told her, no, instead, I asked her which country she wanted to go for a holiday to celebrate her birthday?  My whole family  of 5 together with her left on a jet plane to Hong Kong staying in a 5 Stars hotel for two weeks. The most remarkable part of the holiday is that when we brought her to one of the largest seated Buddha statues in the world that sits at 34 meters high (112 feet) which is the Big Buddha in Lantau Island. Her determination to walk up all the 260+ steps leading to this immense Buddha made of bronze is amazing! She was greeted with surprise applause from everyone make us even more proud of her health. The bad part is the coming down. Thanks Buddha! My two daughters provided leg massages for her and after our vegetarian lunch (A must eat when you are there), we headed back to the hotel for her to rest. I believe this is the best 2 weeks of family time together and not forgetting with two remarkable women in my life!

 

I believe this is the best 2 weeks of family time together and not forgetting with two remarkable women in my life!

 

You don’t live for 85 years on this earth without a few happiness and many disappointments. Heartache is an equal opportunity and though I am very sure my mother-in-law never studied much, she has approached the vicissitudes of life with serenity.  If someone dies before her, that moment always taught her to live in the present.

 

She is a master of strategy on the budget. When times were tough financially, she approached the situation pragmatically and still working in the workforce in her 60s.

 

While, how can a woman who has been through the Japanese war and still be (F) Friendly (S) Strong and (Y) Youniquely stand by most of her friends to be such a happy person? If you knew her you would understand. She’s interested in everything and she talks to everyone. And by that I mean everyone. Whether you’re her lifelong friend, a karang  guni man (rag & bone man) or someone standing next to her in the marketplace, she will engage you in conversation. And when she asks, “Ho-Boh”?  she actually means “how are you” sincerely. She makes new friends wherever she goes. The doctors and nurses in her ward which she is staying for this couple of days in TTSH said she is the best happy patient in the ward. She told the doctor that the house bed is boring and she needs a change of environment.

 

Her sense of humour is marvellous not just in the hospital . On many occasions, included this one on our kitchen table during a meal, she described the typical day of an 85-year-old . First thing in the morning she goes into the bathroom to brush 2 sets of teeth. Once she is done with putting the teeth back into position, she will moves to the kitchen and take her pills and prepares breakfast.

 

Life for her is an adventure. She has strong opinions and her sense of humour is marvellous, she finds joy in the things you would expect of many grandmothers, a well-skilled mahjong player, a mixed vegetarian and black vinegar pig’s trotters dinner make our days. But this woman who is steadily shrinking before our eyes take pleasure in the small details of life. Her glutinous rice Dumplings! 粽子! Bak Chang is not just a traditional of love to our family, in fact, my ex-colleagues and friends love it so much that annually I have to ask her to make 100. She makes the best fancy lemon meringue pie in the world. I used to bring one for my meetings and not forgetting  my children will dip into the black vinegar pig’s trotters and many foods that she has prepared.

 

She raised the woman who is the love of my life, the mother of our three children.

 

She does not live in the past. She still walks to the market, cooks every day, she can speak so many languages and have so many stories to share. She might not learn to use a computer in her 80s but she has a smartphone and keeps in touch with us.

 

She knows the value of coffee therapy and is always ready to sit and listen to a family member who needs time to unburden. I didn’t know that she have a 3 hours chit-chat with my second daughter when my daughter visited her.  Raising children, she understood that the coffee table was the best place to air grievances, settle arguments and discuss the future.

 

We do so many things in life in the wrong order. We drink soup after our dinner or eat fruit after our meals. Sometimes, we shit before we take off our pants. We sleep past midnight and told our parents we sleep early. We play with our smartphones with foods in our mouth.  We eat dinner and later dessert and want to lose weight. We never look each other into the eyes rather we prefer blue eye (blue screen)

 

So, I don’t want to wait for the wrong order to happen, that’s to write her eulogy after she is gone. Besides, I would never be able to write this, So it’s better to pen it now and keep inside my website as a story. I want to tell her now and share with you.

 

 My Closing Thoughts, what I have learned from my Mother-in-law,

 

(F) Forgive as you have been and would like to be forgiven.

(S) Simplify your expectation and accept the differences.

(Y) You endeavor to understand more than to be understood.

(D) Do your best to build the family relationship than be “Right.”

 

Family relationship matters because whatever your actions in today affect all your future lives.

 

Buddha blesses my mother-in-law for a speedy recovery and long life. As I always believe that we should live short, short 100 years 人 生 短 短 一 百 年 Ren Sheng Duan Duan Yi Bai Nian.

 

 I rephrased the old saying to 人 生 短 短 一 百 年 to make it more measurable. “We live short, short 100 years”

 

PPSS: In fact we should start writing eulogy rather than resume for the job interview. Believe me, I have yet to prep a resume. If you browse through my website and read my Friday Sharing w/you section. You might read  4 eulogies written on me.

 

 Acknowledgements

My FSY’s sharing is unscientifically and some are contributed by wife & children, friends, acquaintances. I write and share things that matter to me. I understand that everyone have their own opinions, views, & thoughts. There are no right or wrong answers. Nothing is true or untrue, most facts and data can be twisted to your favour.

To the authors, contributors and original sources, my thanks and where appropriate my apologies if I forget to quote your names.  If I took a page from your generous sharing and tweaked it into something else, something I hope will spread and the whole purpose is for sharing and sharing is caring.